For a long time, I lived what most people would call a dream life. Travel photos filled my feed. Business class tickets were the norm. I chased moments, luxury experiences, and what others might call the “high life.” And to be honest? I loved it. It wasn’t a show, it was my actual life. I was working hard, earning well, and treating myself to the kind of freedom I never thought I’d have.
Weekend getaways. Impulse tech upgrades. Spontaneous island hops just to watch a music festival. I wasn’t reckless; I was still saving, investing, and staying below my means. But my lifestyle was, in a word, indulgent.
Then life shifted. And so did I.
The high of always saying yes
For about eight years, I was in what I now call my “YOLO prime.” There was a high in saying yes to everything. A seat upgrade? Sure. A resort stay I didn’t technically need but really wanted? Done. A new collection launch from a favorite brand? Add to cart. If it brought me joy, I went for it.
I built a reputation around it, too. Friends joked that I was the go-to for “Where’s the best spot in El Nido?” or “Which Tokyo steakhouse is worth the splurge?” It was flattering. Until it wasn’t.
Over time, something strange happened. People began expecting me to always be doing something fabulous. To always be on the move. To always say yes.
Suddenly, it wasn’t just me who wanted the life; it felt like I had to keep performing it.
When enough is… enough
Eighteen months ago, I found myself at a crossroad. Work had slowed down. Expenses were still manageable, but the margin for indulgence was getting tighter. I could technically keep up the lifestyle, but at what cost?
More importantly, I didn’t feel like that person anymore.
I wasn’t excited to book flights. I wasn’t craving another pricey tasting menu. I wanted stillness. Space. I wanted to feel like I wasn’t spending just to maintain a highlight reel.
So I pulled back.
No more twice-a-month flights. No more upgrading just because I could. No more shopping to celebrate random Tuesdays. I didn’t go into hiding. I just simplified.
From “high life” to “smart life”
A funny thing happens when you stop keeping up with your own image: You feel free.
For the first time in years, I wasn’t worried about curating my life to match anyone else’s expectations; not my followers’, not my family’s, not my own past self’s. I was living with more intention.
Now my weekends look different. I walk more. I cook more. I still travel – but not to escape – more to reconnect. I find joy in booking trips with points, in staying with friends, in slow mornings that cost nothing.
READ: Traveling Mindfully: How to Be More Present in the Little Moments
I realized that downgrading wasn’t a failure. It was a form of self-respect.
Downgrading isn’t defeat
Here’s what I’ve learned: there’s nothing shameful about adjusting your lifestyle.
We outgrow things. We change. The energy I had at 28 is different from the energy I have now. And that’s not a bad thing. That’s maturity.
Living above your means might buy applause, but it also buys anxiety. It’s expensive to impress people. Especially when most of them don’t even know what you’re sacrificing behind the scenes.
READ: How to Practice Conscious Spending Every Day
You know what’s priceless? Peace. Not having to check your bank app before a hangout. Not feeling dread when a new bill comes in. Not resenting your job just because you’re living to fund an image you no longer enjoy.
How I actually feel now
I still like nice things. But I’ve stopped needing them to feel valid. I’ve stopped treating luxury like it was a personality trait.
There’s this saying I heard recently: “Your lifestyle should match your values, not your ego.” That hit.
I don’t need to post from five-star hotels to know I’m doing okay. I don’t need the latest drops to feel current. I feel proud when I say no to things that don’t align anymore.
Yes, we only live once. But let’s not f* it up
YOLO doesn’t mean live recklessly. It means live meaningfully. That includes being real with yourself about what season of life you’re in.
I’m not saying never treat yourself. I still do. But now I ask: Do I want this for me, or for the applause? Is this a want, a need, or just an old habit?
READ: I Used to Book Every Holiday Break—Now I Stay In to Do a Home Reset
You can still be aspirational without going broke. You can still live well without living loud. You can still be happy without being on display 24/7.
Will I go back to the luxe life?
Maybe. Maybe not. I don’t see this as a permanent downgrade. I see it as a recalibration.
If things align again – more income, less stress, real desire – maybe I’ll book those wild trips again. But I’ll do it from a place of joy, not pressure. Not performance.
Because at the end of the day, the most expensive thing we can lose… is ourselves.
And I’ve decided I’m no longer willing to pay that price.
To anyone reading this
Don’t be afraid to downgrade. Don’t be afraid to evolve.
You don’t owe anyone a consistent aesthetic. You don’t owe your past self a repeat performance. You don’t owe the algorithm your peace of mind.
You owe yourself a life that fits.
Live your truth. Stay responsible. Be free.
And yes, we only live once. So let’s not mess it up chasing what no longer matters.
